about me
I’m Lauren Reitzel!! I’m an English literature studies and writing student at the University of Michigan, and I want to thank whatever it was that led you to my WRT 220 portfolio website. Upon transferring to U-M after playing NCAA lacrosse and studying political science at Grand Valley State University, I thought, and knew, that I was finally stepping into a place in my life in which I could be unapologetically myself. All at once, I’m surrounded by peers who have the same values, the same wonderings of the depths of our creativity, and the same drive to seek out just that. I’ve always had a desire to live a life and earn an education where I’m given the space to explore myself and my potential, and with this desire, comes visions, worlds, and characters that I see parts of myself in.
I love to immerse myself in media that allows for not only the chance to learn more about myself and the world around me, but provides escapism. The wood-paneled walls of my 122 year-old Ann Arbor home are lined with book stacks and covered in posters inspired by my favorite music, art, films, and prose, reminding me of the endless media and entertainment that has shaped the way I perceive my own narrative.
I grew up in the clean-cut, voted ‘best city in the United States to raise your kids’ Chicago Suburb of Naperville, IL, but despite its stellar reputation, being surrounded by perfectionism has a way of taking its toll on a teenage girl. I fantasized what it would be like to live in a town with low expectations and low incomes, where the most that is expected from you was to graduate high school, instead of the high pressure environment that I lived in which stresses acceptance and enrollment in an Ivy and lines of cocaine. It wasn’t until I found myself immersed in reading and stories that I found myself accepting the reality in which I was raised; yes, that kind of pressure on students at such a formidable age isn’t typical, but I’ve never wanted to be typical- I want to be extraordinary.
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Devouring prose and poetry, escaping from the dream life that inspired my nightmares gave me the chance to grasp an understanding of the opportunities held out before me. You might think that I was an ungrateful child, or that I was so consumed by my privilege as I drank it like poison, but the escapism of stories and words are a remedy to any and all broken minds. With that, I want to introduce you to my project: a book trailer for a book that (as of now doesn’t exist) sets itself in the suburb of Naperville.
about the project
On our very first day of the semester, the very first day of class, the minor in writing gateway project was introduced, and I immediately had a vision coming together in my mind. A diamond cut, all American girl destroyed at the hands of her own doing.
Broken glass, frantically attempted to be put back together. Voices whispering, taunting “what’s the worst thing you’ve ever done” in the middle of the night, never letting her put those horrible things to rest. Looking into the mirror and not recognizing the reflection staring back. These are the images and ideas that immediately took hold of my mind, and I knew that somehow, my gateway final would tell this story.
The book trailer, which serves as the highlight and main source for my project, depicts the story teased in the “if you want more” tab. With only a vision, an undying perseverance and situational hyperfocus, but a lack of a completed story, I wanted to find a way to immerse the viewer and the reader, to do anything I could to elicit the rawness and exhaustion the character feels. Maybe remind them of a time they looked around and didn’t know how to save themselves. Maybe even make you uncomfortable with the harsh truth of how we treat others, and how we allow ourselves to be treated.
I see myself in the diamond tears she cries. I see myself in the need for perfection, and the juxtaposing disgust for wanting it at the same time. I see myself in her disdain for her own reflection. Reader, this project is an intimate glimpse into my own self perception, and the sometimes pessimistic shades I paint the world. Luckily, I can’t say that I actively look in the mirror and see our character's reflection looking back at me anymore. All it is, at the end of the day, is a creation in which I see who I used to be, who I had the potential to become if I’d chosen a different path. And, my reader, for your own sake, I hope that you don’t feel the same way.
